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Teen's: Too Hurt To Be Touched, Turned Around or Transformed?


REACTION TO: 
Chap Clark, Hurt 2.0: Inside the World of Today’s Teenagers 
(Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Academic, 2011) 264pp.

                I resonated with so much that is in this book—personally and professionally. It isn’t hard to want to take to heart the challenge to be a youth advocate once reading Clark’s findings about today’s youth. Adults who want to be effective in reaching out to this generation need to consider Clark’s presuppositions—today, not many are “getting it”—not the church, the schools, youth workers or parents. What IS going on inside the world of today’s teenagers? I am still in the process of re-wiring my mental thought processes to Clark’s ‘underworld’ schemata but frankly it is taking a while—he states in his update to his first edition, “It isn’t getting any better,” and that is the ‘why’ for this second edition.
                This is yet another book which speaks to the elongation of adolescence but doesn’t give a complete definition (explicitly) of what a healthy ‘normal’ teenager looks like today. One could glean implicitly from what Clark speaks against and reports negatively about. Clark seems to report how bad it was for teens before and that things are so much worse for them today—how things are definitely different for them since the days we were in High School. At one point I wondered how he and George Barna who reports in his book, Revolutionary Parenting, how spiritual champions are raised today, would come together to discuss how healthy kids come to be today. This almost seems to be an impossible chore to accomplish from Clark’s book. But his book isn’t a parenting book, it is an exposing book.
                In many ways I see the older generations simply reaping in the next what they themselves have sown--the entitlement attitude for example. Adults today believe kids today should respect them first, as if they are entitled to it. This book gives in detail why this generation should not respect them. Respect and other virtues won’t be found until all of us see how youth are trying to survive in the world and culture we have built (dug?) for them. They are simply reacting to our pushing them to the side or launching them into the proverbial cultural sea “without a rudder or a compass.” Today’s adolescents have been abandoned.
                What has happened is that it seems the 60s kids never grew up--they were to progress from dependence to independence to interdependence but stopped. In their search for continued survival in a post-World War society, they have abandoned the next generations to ‘figure it out for yourself’ while they distanced themselves to live their own lives. But live them for what? It looks like the biblical book of Judges all over again. But where are the Judges? When is the next Advent? We need another incarnation. We need to stop leaving our kids “to themselves” as Solomon says which reaps more of the same consumer culture we find ourselves in which sees both us and them as things to cash in on and leave emotionally bankrupt. This creates a make-believe world where teens today walk as avatars to merely been seen but not ever heard—the real teen is sublevel living his or her life seemingly protected but lonely. Our culture neglects them so they act as if they don’t need adults—not the kind at least that further abandons them. They want safety. Isn’t that the kind of world we all seek to create at some level and in our way?
                Is it any wonder then that in a pursuit to cash in on what is available that today’s psychological world is taken the time to update their research on adolescence? This is another form of abandonment Clark states. Professor seekers want the degree and the money without the work of getting their hands dirty with the actual teenagers—let’s just build on another’s work. Today’s teens are different so it does make sense that many studies would be irrelevant and outdated.
                Satan’s plan was unmasked in many findings reported in this book. Satan lies to soon-to-be-parents that life is found in stuff, not people. The deceived parents have kids born into the family and an environment built around this belief. They raise their kids but soon Satan turns the lie back on the parents by telling the kids, “Your parents don’t really care about you. They only care about what advances their lives.” The kids run away from Satan and his lies to those whom they believe and trust to give them the truth and who will protect them—the parents. But the deceptive trap is sprung and as it closes the teens find that over and over again when they approach their parents cannot be found and so believe the lie they were told. When the parents finally snap out of their deception and try to gain their children’s trust they have layers and layers of abandonment memories to try and work through. Most parents give up. Some keep it up for years with no success—the kids have been too scarred, too trapped. But then there are some who continue to believe the lie can be broken and that the children are worth what it takes to break it. And the kids hope that one day mom and dad will come through those doors and try just one more time. “Will they come?” is the question this book ends with.

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